Nigel recently came for a visit. It was a greatly appreciated time together for both of us particularly since it almost didn't happen. Up to a few hours before his flight left, neither of us were sure if he was actually going to get on the plane to come out here. You see, Nigel is deathly afraid (just shy of phobic) about flying. So much so that in his 43 years of life, he's only been on a plane a handful of times. On top of that, the upcoming (now past) trip was going to be the first time he had ever flown alone. So there was significant terror going on, but fortunately and admirably, he rose above it and made his way here and back home safely.
Fear is an interesting emotion. It is certainly a natural and, at times, necessary feeling. It warns us of when we're confronting a potentially dangerous or harmful situation and can put our senses on alert so that we can engage the situation in as careful a manner as possible. Often, specifically when we allow it to control us rather than alert us, fear, itself, is more harmful than the situation that may evoke it. Cue FDR.
I find it interesting that many people think that hate (another small word with big impact) is the most dangerous emotion on the planet when it is really fear that is at the root of so many of the ills that have plagued human kind. Think of an -ism and fear is smack in the middle of it -- racism, terrorism, sexism, anti-semitism and so forth all stemming from an irrational fear of the differences between people -- a fear of the unknown. Fear of being hurt can cause us to destroy the most beneficial of relationships and fear of being alone can keep us in the most destructive. And most dangerously, at least to me, the fear of what might happen can keep us from experiencing all that is possible. It can even keep us separated from the ones we love, if we let it.
So when it comes to fear, it's best to remember that it is an emotion that is meant to serve us and not the other way around.
