Friday, September 23, 2011

now it's time to say goodbye

so my time as a resident of massachusetts is rapidly dwindling. this morning i met with a representative from the moving company to do a survey of the items that need to be packed and moved. over the last few hours, i've packed and carried six boxes from my office to the car. later tonight is the first of four goodbye dinners/receptions that i will have with friends and coworkers over the next week, having also had a dinner with another friend/colleague and her husband last sunday. i think it's beginning to sink in that this all is happening and that i actually am relocating.

i am really grateful for the well wishes and goodbyes and will do my best to savor the experiences, still, there is a part of me that wishes i was already on the other side of this process -- like way on the other side, settled in the new job, settled in my new home (completely furnished and functional), settled in new friendships and relationships. now considering that to get to the state i just described will likely take, at the very least, six months to a year, i'm thinking i better sit back and just do my best to enjoy the ride. plus, as i get older, i'm recognizing that wanting time to pass by quickly is not necessarily such a good thing, what with the human mortality thing and all.

goodbyes, even highly anticipated ones, are not easy -- at least not for me. closing the door on the familiar and moving out into the unknown seems to require a level of enthusiasm and eagerness that at times i wonder if i'm still able to muster sufficiently. i think it's for that reason that i've been going through the last few weeks with one thought in mind, "i really hope this is my last big move for awhile." we'll just have to wait and see on that one.

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marin mazzie - back to before (ragtime) July 4, 1998

ii was reminded of this performance tonight and wanted to share it here as a tribute to a phenomenal talent who left us way too soon.