why now?

Sitting here listening to music. Sarah McLachlan, natch. This time Afterglow. In response to Nigel's questions about "why now?" and "what happened?" I think the lyrics to the song "Time" pretty much say it all (or at least how they speak to me). I can't think of a song that better characterizes my feeling about our relationship. I used to listen to it many a time back in St. Louis and silently weep inside (I've also linked the title to a You Tube playing of the song if you'd like to listen to it, just click on the title to this entry):

Time here,
all but means nothing, just shadows that move across the wall
They keep me company, but they don't ask of me
they don't say nothing at all.
And I need just a little more silence
And I need just a little more time
But you send your thieves to me
silently stalking me
Dragging me into your wall
Would you give me no choice in this?
I know you can't resist, trying to reopen a sore

Leave me be, I don't want to argue
I'd just get confused and I'd come all undone
If I agree, well, it's just to appease you
Cause I don't remember what we're fighting for

You see love-- a tight, thorny thread that you spin in a circle of gold
You have me to hold me
a token for all to see
captured to be yours alone
And I need just a little more silence,
and I just need a little more time
The courage to pull away
there will be hell to pay
the deeper you cut to the bone

Leave me be, I don't want to argue
I'd just get confused and I'd come all undone
If I agree, well, it's just to appease you
Cause I don't remember what we're fighting for

Time here,
all but means nothing,
just shadows that move across the wall
They keep me company,
but they don't ask of me
they don't say nothing at all.

Leave me be, I don't want to argue
I'd just get confused and I'd come all undone
If I agree, well, it's just to appease you
Cause I don't remember what we're fighting for