so the days amble on and with each one there seems to be another little piece of myself that i'm losing. this morning over breakfast i found myself thinking about a comment that i made several weeks ago about september, and in that reflection came the stark realization that what i had believed would indeed not be coming to pass. a slight surge happened in the undercurrent of sadness that has been running deep in my soul. a surge and then the waters subsided to their steady, continuous flow.
as i moved on from breakfast and lumbered into my car to leave for work, i thought about the loss of the belief in that hoped for september and was confronted yet again with the perspective of whether i should continue to believe that there will be any such "septembers" in my future. and as i let go of yet another belief, i then thought, "i guess there's really not much i'm believing in these days."
where do those lost hopes, dreams, and beliefs actually go i wonder? perhaps they are washed away with the surge.
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