the thing about days like today is being out of one's normal routine tends to provide the opportunity for a revelation to sneak up on one. such was the case today and i have today's posted "blog song of the day" to thank for it. i suppose it's kind of fitting that the song comes from the same artist whose song inspired the titling of this blog.
i heard this particular song as i was driving in my slightly injured vehicle from my doctor's appointment headed to pick up an item at the grocery store en route to dropping off the new script. it's a pleasant song and has a definite summer time vibe to it. for that reason alone, i thought it might be a good candidate for being posted here. as i heard a particular lyric, i smiled and thought, "i guess that in addition to this being a fun song, it's one where james is sharing that he realizes his purpose in life is to entertain people. it's good to know your purpose in life." and then i arrived at the store and that was that.
later, this time driving from my appointment with the insurance adjuster to drop the estimate off at the body repair shop, listening to another jt song, i thought back to listening to this posted song earlier. it was then that i heard that still, small voice that brings most of my epiphanies to me saying,
you do realize that it's this whole idea of purpose that is causing you so much pain and frustration. at work you feel what clarity of purpose you had is being thwarted. with your friend you are unclear as to what purpose you have in one another's lives. and more broadly you question if you have any purpose in the broader world around you. your life has been a constant struggle with the 'why' of it all. you feel that as soon as you have a little clarity it vanishes. just as you feel you are making a contribution either to a specific individual or a group of people, the relationships change. you are a purpose driven person. it is the fuel for your life and without it you feel lost and without value.
and that was that. i had that feeling you get when you realize a truth has been revealed. it was something that i had been feeling but not fully understanding -- something that was just out of reach of my fuller comprehension. while it was good to know what the problem is, there was no insight provided of what the answer is or when or even if there would be an answer. maybe that's for another car ride to come.
that's why i'm here - james taylor
No comments:
Post a Comment