Monday, November 11, 2013

what happens next

this was some weekend. some truly wonderful, special moments. some funny ones. ome very difficult ones. much emotion. some decisions made.  at first, with resolve and without reservation. now waking at 2 am and with more pondering, the weight and gravity and fear of what may be next has set in.

i've lived for many years in an environment of fear of the unknown. this revelation may be surprising to some as i would imagine from the outside it appears that i've done quite a bit of bold risk-taking. but if you look closer, you will see fear has also been right there in the shadows, whispering to me, motivating me to make some decisions that were better left unmade. i am not alone and have been ably aided and abetted in this effort. if anything, fear has kept an untenable situation in place for far too long.

i've drawn on the same source for many a reflective song. i imagine i will continue to do so as it has been a rich field from which to draw emotional expression. you know how there are just some artists and particular albums that just seem to be written just for you. this is certainly one of them. and as i ponder what may be next, this song powerfully, completely reflects exactly where i am at this moment.

new way to bleed - evanescence

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