walking into another life

i took another walk today. at one point i wished that i could just keep walking until i could walk out of this life into a better one. at another point as i realized that my current walking path was not going to allow for that desire to be fulfilled, i just sat down and couldn't move. it was as if failing the first solution maybe just refusing to move from the spot i was in would mean i wouldn't have to return to my current life with all of the confusion, pain, sadness and emptiness that abounds with every moment. after some time i realized the futility of this approach and got up and walked home back to this life i have but neither understand or seem to be managing very well.