an offer i can refuse

i believe i've mentioned that michael, my ex, has been making contact with me in what i am assuming is an attempt to maintain some type of friendship relationship with me. over the course of a few emails and a facebook chat, he's shared perspectives about being concerned about me, offering words of advice and assurances that he will always be available for support and words of encouragement.

while this may seem like a lovely sentiment,  michael's post break-up attitude makes me feel as if he and i were living in two different realities when we were together. from my vantage point, while i appreciate the sincerity of his offer, i feel that there has been more than enough damage caused by our intimate involvement in one anothers' lives, and therefore, i'm not looking to continue that dynamic.

with that thought, here's a song that pretty much captures how i feel about the situation. the one deviation that my life does take from the lyrics is that i do often feel like i'm drowning and some saving would be in order (ditto with feeling lost). still when i think about michael's offer of help, i envision that situation being akin to throwing this drowning man an anchor.

king of anything - sara bareilles